Honk Honk

I love it when someone honks their horn at me, you know… the tiny little toot that says “hello”, or the one that says “schools out for summer!” or even the one that you hear in tunnels; those really make me grin.

But the horns I hate are the one that say: “Get out of my way!” It doesn’t matter whether they are honking at me or someone else - it still jangles my nerves, and for a few seconds I actually think I have done something dangerously wrong. I have reviewed the matter and find that not once has the hate-horn done any good - in fact it han't even been warranted. It only makes things worse and can actually be the cause of an accident plus the bad feelings last for at least 20 minutes, setting a sour tone for the day.

Yes, friends have honked from outside, and that’s rude. It bothers everyone who hears it, there is no emergency; and besides, nobody can tell exactly where it’s coming from except that it’s near your place and they go through the jangled nerves state, too. They like it as much as I do – not much. This spreads a feeling of ill will through the neighborhood and spreads the news that you hang out with scum.

Lately, it appears to be luxury cars that honk the most. I guess those cars were so expensive the owner opted to buy a horn INSTEAD of breaks.

More than once I have been driving (well) and had a pickup truck, or some other macho vehicle come up from behind, and actually honk to make me go faster. I look at the speedometer – I’m already speeding! This is someone telling me they so don’t care about me or my wellbeing and that if I were to slow down, they may next try to drive me off the road. (Where’s a cop when you need one?) Some people say “They must be in a hurry”. Yeah… to DIE! ‘Cuz you know if they are that rude to strangers, they are probably super rude to those close to them. Trust me, those others hate that honker, too. I’ll bet those are the guys that wake up one morning without their dicks.